


Seeing Double

by Just_Call_Me_Floss



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018) Actor RPF
Genre: Crack, Fluff, Friendship, Humour, there will be some romance eventually
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:02:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27331639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_Call_Me_Floss/pseuds/Just_Call_Me_Floss
Summary: Joe Mazzello did not expect to ever in his life have his cardboard cutout of his best friend become human. Ever. He also never expected to have this ex-cardboard cutout become devoted to him.And Ben Hardy never expected to look himself in the eye and want to punch his own face.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9
Collections: Two Years of BoRhap 2020 Exchange





	Seeing Double

**Author's Note:**

  * For [captaincoffeegirl515](https://archiveofourown.org/users/captaincoffeegirl515/gifts).



Joe was woken up in the middle of the night by loud bangs and rattling inside his home. He sat up, awake in an instant. Great, he was being broken into. He’d never met a burglar in real life before, never mind actually been burgled. 

“Shit,” he mumbled, slipping out of bed quietly, feet padded with his nigh socks. Luckily, he kept a baseball bat in his room, ready for this moment. One of the ones off of  _ Undrafted _ , it had everyone’s signatures on it. Guess the burglars would be hit over the head with Duke Davis Roberts and Tyler Hoechlin. In his mind, Joe had this epic action sequence playing of him managing to knock out the thieves in slow motion, knocking teeth out as he got the perfect angle. They’d beg for him to stop, but he’d knock them out, using some rope to tie them up as he called the police. Turns out, they’d been at large for months now, no one managing to sneak up on them as Joe did, the police hadn’t even managed to get them in, but Joe would. Maybe he’d be given a key to the city? What would he do with it? It’d be too big to put on a keychain, surly? If it’s a key to the entire city, it has to be giant.

Another part of his brain, the more logical but overpowered part, was telling him to hide and cry down the phone as he begged the police to come to save him. That’s their job, after all. Heck, these people had managed to break in without tripping the alarms! They’re most definitely bad guys with a good set of skills as locksmiths. Joe is just a semi-successful actor with a loyal fan group, he had no idea on how to beat them… But epic slow-mo fighting sequence… It was decided - he was going to be the hero.

The handy thing about it being his own home is that he knows it like the back of his hand, and can walk around in the dark. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t kick the plant pot or catch his elbow on the door handle, it means he  _ can walk around in the dark _ . He tries his best to figure out where the noises are coming from, and his frown deepens as his slow footsteps lead him through to the living room which is empty, everything totally in place, including his set memorabilia. No lights are even on. What are they going for? Joe gasps as quietly as he could. Have they scooped out his place before?! Are they doing a targeted attack?

Slow, calculated footsteps take him through into the kitchen. This is where the noise is. He psyches himself up, back pressed against the wall as he tells himself he can do this, he can be the hero and save the day, maybe getting a kiss from a poor damsel as a thank you. Counts down from three, and then jumps into the doorway, bat held in front of him like a lightsaber. His eyes wide, Joe looks around, ready to scream bloody murder as he attacks the burglars. But there's no one there, and again, everything is in its proper place. What type of break-in is this? Thinking about it, there were no broken glass or jimmied-opened doors, so how the hell did they get in here?

Another rattle and bang drew Joe's attention to the storage cupboard in the corner of the room. He approached it, still holding out the bat, as he heard some muttering from the other side of the door before there were a few more bangs and a few louder, more desperate door handles jiggles. Did they get trapped in there? And what were they looking for? It was his junk cupboard, holding his usual cleaning supplies like the hoover and ironing board, as well as his winter coats and other things which didn’t fit anywhere else. He really should’ve cleaned it out at some point, but he’d just been so busy with all his rejected audition tapes and late-night screenplay jumbled ideas.

God, he should really call the police. Like, really he should. They could be armed and dangerous. But really, how dangerous could they be if they got locked in a cupboard? Joe took a steadying breath, reaching out one hand and quickly tugs open the door, raising the bat with the other arm and ready to strike. He was about to when he suddenly got dazzled with a brilliant smile. A smile he knew all too well. The smile of Ben Hardy.

“Ben?!” Joe stood open-mouthed in shock. Here, standing in his kitchen cupboard, was one of his closest friends. Who was standing there, suited up and a genuine smile that melted Joe's heart? He lowered his arm, dropping the bat on the floor with a thud before he pulled the blond in front of him into a massive hug. “What’re you doing here?” He mumbled against the suit jacket shoulder. 

“You put me in here,” Bens arms went around Joe's waist, holding him tight as he shoved his nose against Joe's neck, “where else am I meant to be?”

“I put you in- what?” Joe tried to pull back, but the hold on him was too tight. Ben wasn’t planning on letting go at any point soon. “Ben, what you talking about? You’re- You’re in London. Well, you’re meant to be”

“Nah, been in there for months. Since you did those videos I think,” he does pull back eventually, hands-on Joe's hips as he looks him over. How come Joe suddenly felt very underdressed in his own home at 3 O’Clock in the morning? His years' old t-shirt and moth-eaten pyjama shorts suddenly felt inappropriate when his friend, who he hasn’t seen in way too long, was stood there in a gorgeous black suit, hair brushed back in a styled mess atop his head. Wasn’t that what he’d been wearing to the premier all that time ago? 

“You playing a prank or something? Is Gwil here?” Joe starts looking around, trying to find the lanky man who probably holding up his phone or something.

“Gwil? No! No, it’s just me. And you. Just us, how it should be, yeah?” One of Bens hands came to rub over Joe's chest, and the redhead eyes locked on the movement, eyes wide and eyebrows raised.

“W-What?” Joe licked his lips, voice a little unsteady. Was Ben drunk? Or Joe dreaming? How the hell did this end up happening? He has to be dreaming. But god, did it feel real.

“You heard me,” green eyes dragged up Joe's body to look at his face. “Like how it was in Japan. And-and afterwards, remember, on the sofa?” There was a mischievous glint to them that had Joe's stomach-churning.

“Wait, Japan? You… You were never in Japan. Not with us, anyway. You were filming  _ Six Underground _ , remember?” Joe tried to step away again and managed to put some distance between them, but there was still a hand on him.

“Oh, wait, you think I’m him?” Ben frowned, a little line appearing between his eyebrows, a slight glare in his eyes.

But the words sent a shiver down Joe’s spine. Who the hell is he talking to? “Ben?” His voice went up, unsure. He must be dreaming now. He has to be. But he felt the fingers curling against his hip bone and saw as the eyes rolled in annoyance.

“Yes. Ben. Ben Cardy. Or I think some say Cardy B and even Cardboard Ben”.

Joe let out a startled laugh. Right, yes, of course. The cardboard cutout of his friend, which had started as a joke and ended up having a little bit of longing attached, was nowhere, living and breathing and human. Sure, Joe. Shaking his head, the American moved away from the couch and started walking away, still chuckling to himself. “Alright, sure,” he waved in the air at nothing before rubbing over the bridge of his nose. “I must be more tired than I thought”.

Ben started after him, or Cardy as Joe was now calling him. He could hear the footsteps and was honestly impressed with how realistic his dream felt. “Joe, wait!” Cardy spoke, and Joe laughed again. He must be coming down with something, having a fever dream because that was exactly how Ben sounded. Maybe he was missing him so much that he was now imagining him being here. They’d only face-timed a few weeks ago. He’ll call him again in the morning after he wakes up. “Joe, where we going?”

As he got to his bedroom, Joe fell straight into his messy covers, laying on his front as he felt around for the duvet and pulling it up over the top of him. Cardy was hovering around by the door, but Joe didn’t care anymore. He was only a dream. Or maybe it was a prank, and Ben was really committed. He was a hell of an actor, so maybe he was. “Goodnight, Cardy,” Joe grinned at the nickname, eyes closed as he willed himself back to sleep.

Cardy blinked and watched as his man just went to sleep and ignored him. He thought that there’d at least be some form of excitement at finally being together like Joe had spoken about. He remembered when he was still in his 2D form, when Joe set them up for a dinner, had even cooked him some food he had no idea what it was, and took photos to send to the group chat. Cardy thought it’d be like that. But as he kept looking at Joe, he tried to wrap his head around it. Joe had really gone back asleep. Well, Cardy had seen that before. He’d been in bed with him before as the redhead had slept. So he didn’t think anything of it as he walked around the other side of the bed.

He pulled back the covers, as he remembered Joe doing before, slipping in and settling on his back, the covers coming back up just to cover his chest. He’d been like this before, looking up at the ceiling as Joe laid next to him. Hell, they’d even done a few videos like this. The Other Ben included! So, he stayed where he was meant too, kept his eyes upwards, and listened to Joe as he slept. Maybe he’d be happier when he woke up and found Cardy in a familiar place. Yes, that was it. Cardy smirked, thinking it was a great idea.

\---

It wasn't. It was a horrid idea. 

Joe woke up at a totally more reasonable hour, sunlight dampened by the curtains, but letting enough light in to wake him peacefully. He snorted, eyes still closed, as he remembered his dream, lips curling up in a smile. He’d tell the real Ben about it over the phone. They’d have a laugh and talk all day - it’d be great, exactly what he needed. God, had the dream felt real.

“It was real”.

Joe fell out of bed, body jolting in shock as he heard a deep British accent behind him not having realised he’d spoken out loud. “Holy shit!” He rubbed his elbow, having landed mainly on it, and was quickly on his knees, peaking over the edge of his bed and seeing Ben staring at him, creepily laying dead on his back with his arms straight down and head turned towards Joe. The hair was still in a perfect quiff and dimpled chin jolted outwards as he slightly raised his head to look at the screaming redhead, who was now scuttering backwards until he was up against the wardrobe.

“Joe, stop, what are you doing?” Cardy sat up, keeping his torso straight the entire time, and Joe would admire his core strength if it  _ wasn’t so fucking creepy _ . The man claiming to be the cardboard cutout of his very real best friend was now walking over to him, still in the goddamn outfit, shoes and all. “Stop screaming, it’s only me”.

“Who the hell are you?!” Seeming as he can supposedly move very quickly when crawling backwards in fear, Joe keeps that form of transport going, and scutters around the room, the green eyes never blinking as the guy just spun smoothly and continued his stalk.

“I’m Ben! Good ol’ Cardy,” the voice coming out the rudely pink lips was a perfect imitation of Ben, and he had that slightly wonky tooth as well. They’ve done their research. And Joe is convinced that they’re a murderer. And he’d fucking slept with a murderer in his bed. Honestly, he deserves whatever cruel torture they inflict on him for that. 

“Don’t kill me,” Joe had bumped into another solid object, and tried to scramble up to standing, gripping the object and basically lifting himself up because his legs had turned into some form of jelly, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to stand unaided.

“I’m not- what?” That quirk of an eyebrow, the slight hitch in the voice and the furrowed brow - all perfect Ben expressions, “I’m not a murderer Joe, god! No, no I’m me, for god's sake, what’s so hard to believe about that!”

“Because you’re not you!” Joe's voice was pitchier than he’d hoped, biceps shaking as he leant further onto the furniture, “you’re not you, Ben! You’re-you’re some kind of imposter! A creepily good imposter who is  _ way  _ too dedicated to this whole thing!”

“I’m me! We went over this last night-” Cardy gestured towards the bed, where his side was perfectly neat and crisp, nearly as if no one had slept in it, where Joe's pillow was damp with drool, and the duvet crumbled all over the place. “I’m Cardy B! Not-not that Ben bloke, no, I’m me, and you’re you. It’s that simple!”

“You can’t be Cardy!” Joe stood with a gaping mouth. No way was this happening. Was he still in a dream? “Cardy is… is cardboard, and you are most definitely not”

“Well… yes,” Cardy glanced down at himself, smoothing out the crinkle in the suit that had always bothered him, and felt the fabric on his skin. It was a bit of an odd feeling - well, it all was really. He felt like his insides were stabbing him, yet were full, and he was uncomfortable between the legs. “I see why that’s all a bit confusing, and, well, it is. I don’t really know how to explain it…”

Joe stood, legs finally god damned deciding to work, and he was able to support himself a little better. There was no way this could be an imposter. There isn’t anything wrong with the appearance. Surely Joe would be able to pick up if it was someone else? Heck, even the eyebrow hairs were done exactly like Bens were. “You… You have to explain yourself,” his voice sounded a lot more certain than he himself actually was, “I can’t honestly believe what is happening right now, but I’m, quite stupidly I must admit, going to trust you on this. Only because how the heck we actually got to this point is a mystery, if I’m honest”

Cardy glanced up between his lashes and did that smirk which lived in Joe's mind rent-free, thank you, and the redhead gripped the sideboard a little harder. He gulped, glancing away and made a point of walking confidently out of the room and towards the kitchen, needing to distract himself with some pancakes or waffles or even some fucking musli.

\--------

Joe scoffed the last of the waffle mixture into his mouth, ignoring the guy opposite him, now wearing a pair of Joe's old joggers after a rather embarrassing lesson in bodily functions which now had a pair of slacks in the washing machine and Joe trying to scrub the image of a half-naked man from his mind. 

He’d realised that a) Ben wouldn’t wet himself in the name of a joke, it’s a step too far, and b) the blond at least knew how to use a knife and fork, so this has to be Cardy. He must actually have his previously cardboard cutout sitting opposite him having shoved a waffle in his mouth using his bare hands. Turns out being cardboard for over two years makes you very hungry.

“I can’t believe this,” Joe mumbled as he finished his mouthful, not really feeling like food anymore, but knew he had to eat. He looked at Cardy, who just looked back, taking way too long to blink and making Joe feel uncomfortable each time.

“Aren’t we lucky?” Cardy dazzled Joe for a moment with a bright smile, seeming to genuinely believe that their situation is a form of miracle. “Never thought this would ever happen to us!”

“Yeah, me neither,” Joe muttered as he glanced away before he gave in and smiled back. “I gotta call Ben,” he needed to get up and move, his skin felt tight and hot and was it normal that his heart was beating hard against his chest? 

Like a shadow, Cardy was up and after him, a step too close to be considered comfortable and they made their way to the living room as Joe palmed his phone out of his pyjama pocket. It took him a few clicks to find the name he wanted, and with a heavy sigh, he lifted the camera up and started a FaceTime call, seeing his cardboard cutout in the background. 

“Wait,” Joe turned his head, “don’t stand there-” he wanted to shoo him away, wanted to bring it up naturally to his best friend, but the little noise and crackle from the other side showed they were connected.

“Hey buddy,” Ben spoke around a sandwich, hair still a mess and a few days' stubble on his chin and cheeks. He was enjoying some time off and was currently seeing how long he could go without having to leave the house. Eating whenever he wanted was just a benefit of being between jobs.

Thankfully for Joe, the Brit on the other side of the connection was looking longingly at his sandwich, giving Joe a moment to spin and block Cardy from sight, “Hey Benny!” Did he sound too cheery? He felt like he was too cheery. And the way Ben looked at his phone with a quizzical eyebrow and half-chewed mouthful of food said that Joe had been totally too cheery.

“Yes…” Ben drawled out the last letter before turning back to the sandwich and taking another bite, eyes fluttering as he enjoyed the slightly hard cheese he’d found in the back of the fridge. There was a pause of slightly awkward silence where Joe tried to figure out how the  _ f u c k  _ to tell Ben that his cardboard cutout had come to life. But turns out, Joe doesn’t need to think long, because suddenly Cardy is right behind him.

“Who you talking to?” He squints and leans over Joe's shoulder to look at the screen, moving with Joe when he tries to hide him. “Oh, it’s  _ him _ ”. Cardy’s voice sounded flat and annoyed, and the slightly shocked and panicked Joe looked over his shoulder to see Cardy glaring at Real Life Ben.

“You knew I was going to-” Joe tries to smooth it out and reinstate the peace, but is cut over by his best friend exclaiming in both a ‘ha ha that's funny Joe’ and ‘holy fucking balls on fire what the shit is that’ way.

“Who the fuck is that?” Bens sandwich was now long forgotten, having fallen with a dull thud back onto the plate as he reached to grab the propped up phone to pull it closer. That cheese must’ve been older than Ben thought, because he was obviously hallucinating right now because he could swear that he was looking at himself… in Joe's house… in America.

“Well-” Joe turns again to try and block Cardy from Hardy, but the double just follows after him, glare set on the little screen. Maybe FaceTime hadn’t been the best of ideas?

“Joe, just hang up on him,” Cardy turned to look at Joe, trying to emphatically demand him to end the interaction with the very confused, on verge of having a panic attack, Brit.

“Don’t you bloody hang up I swear to god,” Ben suddenly stood from his chair, feeling like he should be doing something because when that thing on the other side of the phone spoke, it sounded just like him. Was it possible that this was all a dream? That his entire day this far had been a vivid imagination? But that wank before felt so real. And surely he wouldn’t dream himself having to pick up dog shit.

“Woah, ok, let’s-” Joe realised how quickly this was turning into a disaster. He spun 180 degrees and put a hand on Cardys chest  _ (oh my god he feels so real) _ to stop him from following. “Stay there, don’t move or I swear I will… do… something,” the threat lost when he realises that he doesn’t actually have anything to hold against the Ex-Cardboard man in front of him, but the message is heard and Cardy stays. 

“Right,” Joe turns back to his real friend who has been human since the day he met him, “look, I don’t know what to say to you other than this used to be the cardboard cutout version of you. Now-” he quickly hurries his next sentence when he sees Ben frown in confusion, “- I have no fucking idea how it happened. It just did. It’s obviously not you, and it’s-” he gets cut across by Cardy complaining that he is a him, and Joe glares at him briefly before turning back to the camera, “-he is not an imposter, so it’s just easier to accept him as… Cardy”. 

There was silence for awhile, just the three of them being there. Cardy staring at Joe, Joe staring at Ben, and Ben staring off into the distance. Joe didn’t know it but he was holding his breath, fingers holding onto Cardys jacket to ground himself. 

“I’m coming over,” Ben broke the silence and nodded to himself before he bounded out the kitchen towards his bedroom to drag together some form of a suitcase together.

“Wait Ben no-” Why the hell was Ben coming over? He’s on the other side of the world! Joes main agenda of this phone call was to confirm to himself that this wasn’t a really weird prank by Ben, which obviously it wasn’t. He watched as the blond ducked under the bed to try and fish out a bag, all while Cardy was trying to convince Joe to hang up, come on, they can spend time together instead. 

“I don’t fucking know what’s going on,” Bens voice was muffled and the screen showed the ceiling as Ben finally pulled out a bag and started to grab random clothes and throwing them in, folding be damned. “‘Nd obviously you don’t know either. So I’m coming over”.

“What, so we can be confused together?”

“Yeah, exactly”.

\---

Seventeen hours later, Joe was sat in the carpark of the airport, foot tapping anxiously on the floor as he waited for the blond to appear. He’d had a shadow since he’d woken up, stuck to his side with whatever he was doing. Having to shove a muscle massed man who had no idea about social cues out the bathroom was more of a workout than Joe would like to admit. 

Cardy had become handsy too. He always liked to be touching Joe somewhere, and Joe had surrendered his left hand to Cardy after the sixth time the ex-cardboard guy had whined when Joe had tugged it away. This time though, he made Cardy take off his shoes before climbing into bed. Like hell was he going to let him get away with that again.

Ben had gotten the first flight available, going out in public in something his stylist will gut him for doing, and was being picked up by his sleep deprived best friend. And his cardboard cutout.

Coming out into the brisk winter air, Ben frowned to himself, one arm wrapped around his chest as he pretended to keep the heat in. He hoped Joe wasn’t far, as his toes were already cold in the horrid trainers hed shuffled into on his mad rush out. He recognised a car a few rows back, and quickly made his way over, thanking the gods that Joe wasn’t late again and he didn’t have to awkwardly stand and peer at every car that approached.

What he wasn’t thanking the gods for thought was the guy sitting in the front seat. God it was eerie when you had your own face glaring at you. 

“Shove off,” Cardy growled, not making an attempt to leave the passenger seat. He stared up at the long time human who was just gawking at him before suddenly the Real Life Ben stumbled back into the car behind him, hand coming to cover his mouth as he dropped the suitcase.

Joe just about got around the car intime to see Ben puking up the plane food and to hear Cardy laughing. 

\---------

Cardy ended up in the backseat, knee pressing into the seat in front of him as he glared daggers into the back of Ben’s head, who was trying his hardest not to look back at the weirdly mean version of himself in the mirror. Guess that makes him the nice twin though.

“Stop glaring, Cardy,” Joe sighed as the cardboard cutout turned to him in the mirror and pouted, shuffling a little so hes closer to Joes side of the car. A hand reached out to touch Joes upper arm, and the American left it there. If it keeps him bloody settled…

Ben glanced at Joe as well, eyebrows furrowed as he saw his own hand which wasn’t his hand touching Joe all the time. It was weird that Ben got so agitated by it, even if he’d only been here for half an hour. It’s just creepy that Cardy seems to have a need to touch Joe all the time, and even creepier that he was wearing Joes clothes that were a touch too small and showed off the muscles Ben had back then. God, he’d been in shape for Six Underground. 

“Stop glaring, Benny,” Joe watched out the corner of his eye as his friend blushed slightly and turned to look out the other window. Was it bad that Joe was finding this a touch amusing? It’s been a long time since someone has actually been wanting his attention for so long, and now to have two blond Brits doing it? Yeah, his ego was having a little boost from it all. 

They got back to Joes place without any more petty fights. Cardy was stick to Joes side the entire time, getting between the two long time friends and staking his claim. He’d waited for MONTHS in a CUPBOARD for this! He wasn’t just going to let the stupid blond who’d hidden his feelings walk up and take Joe from him. Did noone realises how boring it can get staring at a mop? 

“Okay, he really doesn’t get any less freaky,” Ben sighed, nose crinkling up as he eyed up his double. Cardy just did the same back and it gave Joe such a state of weird deja vu that he had to close his eyes and take a few steadying breaths”.

“Still got no idea why you’re here,” Cardy huffed and grabbed Joes hand, smiling wide as Joe automatically took his hand. 

“Because this is a weird situation and he wanted to come,” Joe can’t believe that literally standing by his front door would be such a hassle when he has two Bens with him. Seemed they were going to be petty towards each other the entire time. 

“I came here to help my mate,” as Joe started to walk towards the kitchen, Ben started to follow, and of course Cardy was there, nearly tripping over Joes feet he was standing that close. 

The trio were like some kind of weird unit, moving in formation with Joe being flanked either side by the blonds. He could practically hear them mentally bickering through glares and childish shoves. The older man sighed. He needed a drink. A strong one. And prompto. 


End file.
